Living life. Learning lessons.

Lessons I've learned in my life.

1. You can't change people. Only yourself. You should be the "change" you want to see in others.

2. The worst hurt a person can feel is not when they hurt themselves. It's when they hurt those closest to them.

3. Life is a simple term for a never-ending, fast-paced, educational adventure. Learn something new every day. Don't take things for granted.

4. In a realtionship, a man thrives on the "three minutes of glory" while the women thrives on three hours of communication, closeness, and honesty.

5. Being a stay-at-home mom is far more exhausting that working 40 hours a week. The work at home is never finished, and you are there most of the time to notice.

6. A house is a structure where people eat and sleep. A home is a place where unconditional love exists throughout.

7. Be very careful of who you let in your "inner circle." Most people are out only for themselves.

8. If you worry about the small things all the time, you'll always miss out on what's most important in life.

9. To truly love someone is a gift. To be loved by someone is a blessing.

10. Not all people are capable of love. These people manipulate and twist things so they are in their own favor. You will get hurt. The question is how long will you allow it to go on.


If at the end of each day, you sat and thought back on things you learned --not about others but-- about yourself. What could you do, to make yourself a better person. What could you do to show others how to treat you right.

Vacation?!?

Jason is taking a week's vacation this next week. And, guess where we're going?! Right, to see family. for the whole week AND the weekends preceding and following. Yea! I guess. I'm ready to start taking vacations to places we haven't been. Somewhere out of the normal.
In a way, I understand where Jason comes from. He's always been extremely close with his family, and this is one of the few times we get to see them.
Jason is just worried that the time will pass so fast, and one day, he'll wake up and his loved ones will have passed on. He doesn't want to miss out.
Honestly, I don't blame him. I know what it's like to lose someone close to you, and to wish you would have spent more time with them.

So, for now, I guess I will keep my mouth shut, and enjoy this time away with our family. It really isn't bad there either. I actually enjoy myself a LOT when I'm there. McKeonly always has a blast. And Jason, of course, he loves every minute of it. He gets to go fishing, hunting, shooting prairie dogs, and most importantly, he gets to spend time with his dad and his uncle(who is like a second dad to him).

A Different Take on Life's Priorities

A professor stood before his philosophy class and had something in front of him.

When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked one more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous "yes."The professor then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The students laughed.

"Now," said the professor, as the laughter subsided, "I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life.
The golf balls are the important things--God, family, your children, your health, your friends, and your favorite passions--things that, if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.
The pebbles are the other things that matter like your job, your house and your car. The material things.
The sand is everything else--the small stuff. If you put the sand into the jar first," he continued, "there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls.
The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you.Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness.
Play with your children. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your spouse or children out to dinner. Play another 18. There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal.
Take care of the golf balls first--the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand."

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what the coffee represented.The professor smiled, "I'm glad you asked.
It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple cups of coffee with a friend."

It's Gonna Be. . .A Lovely Day

For the past few days, I've been having a difficult time dealing with some things.

Recently, I decided to make a mends with my family, and begin a new relationship with them all. I told myself to separate each one and have a separate relationship with each one individually. Just like you would with friends. Unfortunately, it wasn't as easy as I'd planned on it being.
The truth is, there is no way to accomplish this when they are mostly all attached to the source of drama and separation: my mom. She never has wanted us to be close. Even when we were growing up. I guess she just wanted us all to be dependent on her. It's worked so far for my three sisters. But my brother and I moved at least 6 hours away from it all, and we are living without that dependence on my mom. Actually, we are doing great compared to my sisters. We are living without government help. We are happily married to two wonderful people. And we are generally happy with the lives we've created without the help of our mom and dad. (Of course, finances and marriage are no easy walk in the park all the time.)
But, for some reason I can't get past the fact that my family is who they are, and they will never change. EVERY time I try to talk to any of them, I somehow get drug into the middle of some unneccesary drama. And . . .in the end, I get blamed for something. ALWAYS. I think it is because I am so far away, and I'm the easiest target because I'm not there to defend myself. But, the truth is, I don't need this drama in my life. There's nothing I can do to help it, and there's no reason why I should even be dealing with it.
So, after much prayer, I have come to the realization that I have to accept who these people are. They are NOT my family. Because MY family would not treat me this way. My family does not treat me this way. And my family has never forsaken me like I allowed these people to. This is a fact I will have to accept.

"Forgiveness does not always lead to a healed relationship. Some people are not capable of love, and it might be wise to let them go along with your anger. Wish them well, and let them go their way."
"It really doesn't matter it the person who hurt you deserves to be forgiven. Forgiveness is a gift you give yourself. You have things to do and you want to move on."
--Real Live Preacher, reallivepreacher.com

McKeonly's First Garden

Yesterday, McKeonly asked if she could get some flower seeds to plant. So, today Jason took her to the store and got her some anemone bulbs. When we got home, I spent about an hour digging up a spot in the backyard that would allow as much sunlight as the flowers would need.

Then McKeonly and Jason came out, and together we planted the "seeds." Then we covered them up with potting soil, and McKeonly watered them.

I broke out the video camera afterwards, while she was watering and "teaching" Daddy how to water them. It was so sweet. Although, she was thinking that she should be seeing flowers already.

Tonight, when I put her to bed, we talked about them, and I told her how she had to wait. But, I am hoping that they'll bloom within two to three weeks. For her sake. She's really anxious. I'll be posting the video up on my YouTube account which you can access through the "YouTube" link in the right column on this page.

I remember how badly I wanted to have a little boy, but every day, I am so thankful that I have this little girl. She is so loving and caring and interested in learning about everything that I do. We painted our toenails today too. Which made me pretty happy --and a little cautious-- that I have this little human being who wants to be just like me and do everything that I do.

I just love my life so much. I am so blessed!

Unanswered Prayers

I love this term, and I always have since Garth Brooks came out with this song back in the day. . .

I guess my 'unanswered prayers' have mostly made me realize that I pray to God more when I need Him and less when I'm doing just fine. The times when I get my own self in a mess, and I just pray to Him to ask for whatever I'm in need of rather than asking Him for what He has planned for me.

At the end of the day, though, I often sit back and reflect on my selfish 'wishes' that I had once prayed for God to make happen. . .that never did. . .And now I know why.

Thank you God, for the life you've given to me. My wonderful family, and home that You have provided for us. All of the blessings in my life that I forgot to ask for. Thank You!

Play Group

After an extreeemely long day yesterday away from McKeonly for something which turned out to be. . .more or less, a fluke, I decided to take up my friend's invite to a play group today.

It was actually pretty relaxing. To be able to get McKeonly and myself out of the house for a few hours. She played with all of the kids, we went to the park, and us moms were able to --for the most part-- sit down and talk. Of course, most of it revolved around the kids. All I can say was thank goodness Judy had a large house because there were us five moms and like 11 or 12 kids.

It was fun though. Everything about it. After 3 hours, though, I decided McKeonly was probably going to start showing that she needed her nap, so we ended up leaving so she could get it in. She did. In fact, we both did. I really am thankful that God has put some Godly women in my life. And, they all have good kids too so I wasn't constantly worrying about how McKeonly was doing with them.

It was a fun day.

The Meaning of "Help"

According to dictionary.com, there are several different meanings to this word, "help". It actually looks more like a word used to describe an unflattering sound coming from the body, and the more you say it, the more is sounds like an unflattering noise coming from some part of the body. But the actual meaning --or should I say meaningZZZZ-- are as follows:

1. to give or provide what is necessary to accomplish a task or satisfy a need; contribute strength or means to; render assistance to; cooperate effectively with; aid; assist:
He sent her money to try and help her out, but she ended up going behind his back anyway.
2. to save; rescue; succor:
Had she not been passed out, she could have helped her nephew out of the pond where he drowned.
3. to make easier or less difficult; contribute to; facilitate:
The help of a lawyer would have kept things from getting this far
4. to be useful or profitable to:
Her quick actions helped her from getting hurt.
5. to refrain from; avoid (usually prec. by can or cannot):
She can't help that her parents have raised her to belive she cannot succeed without them.
6. to relieve or break the uniformity of:
Being six hours away helps her from getting caught in the middle of it all.
7. to relieve (someone) in need, sickness, pain, or distress.
She was able to help by calling the attorney for a consultation.
8. to remedy, stop, or prevent:
Nothing will help this pattern of dysfunction..
9. to serve food to at table (usually fol. by to):
Please, Help her to the door.
10. to serve or wait on (a customer), as in a store.
Them helping her hand-and-foot allowed her to become morbidly obese and develop diabetes.

The point of all of this, is that although there are many different meanings to the word "help", you cannot help anyone who is not willing to accept it. You cannot help anyone who is not willing to help themselves. It is a sad truth, but one that will "help" you as long as you remember this. The only person you can help is yourself. So take care of YOU. DO not put yourself to the side to help someone else because in the end, it is you who will be hurt. Not them.

Job Searching -- 3rd Party Marketing

So, I went for a preliminary interview today at a third-party marketing company. The job duties would include office work as well as on-site promotional presentations for the company or companies we are representing. Right now, they are actually looking for people to train to become managers, so they can open about 5 other offices throughout the metroplex and pick up more clients. It would be 4 to 6 months of paid training, and then I would get to set up appointments and promotional events for the people under me.

I am really excited about this opportunity. They just called back for a second interview which will be all day Thursday. YEA!

Wish me luck!!

Church

McKeonly and I have finally found a church that I feel we both will gain something from. I know, it took almost three years, but we've moved every year since we've been up here and since she was born.

The church is actually still in the planting stages, here in Anna, but the original one is in Allen. The services, for now, are at 6 in the evening, so it gives us a chance to go out to the MX track with Jason during the day. But, last weekend, we barely made it back in time, and we were running out the door as soon as we got home from the track. I think I'll just start keeping better track of the time.

About the church, it's here in Anna. The first service was Easter evening. They're actually renting a building right now, but they've bought some land and are planning on building the new church within the year. It's A/G so I'm familiar with the principles, but it's nothing like the church I grew up in as a teenager. The people are genuine. They're more my age, and they have kids McKeonly's age. They also have a real good children's program for the kids. The pastor is anointed, and he has a huge heart for missions (i.e. church-planting, helping a country in need, reaching out to the lost)

Honestly, I feel a strong calling to this church. I feel like this church will be a key to helping the kids and teenagers of this town. There is a major drug problem, and there's not much more for the kids to do but have these "rainbow parties" and "cheese parties". I feel like this church and the people in it will be able to reach out to not just the kids in this town, but the adults as well, who are just "content" with life.